Dear NBC: I am not here for your Olympics
Thanks to your disastrous coverage of the Olympics, you are the subject of a bonus “Five Things I’m Not Here For.” I am really not here for…
1. Tape Delay: Believe it or not, it’s the 21st Century, and the ability to broadcast international events live has been around for a few decades. Look, I get that you want primetime ad revenue, but guess what – ESPN airs the Australian Open live at dark thirty o’clock at night, then re-runs the highlights in primetime. Here’s a suggestion – do the same.
1a. SUPER CP Time Tape Delay: Since I live on the West Coast, not only are the final results spoiled due to tape-delay, but the details are super-spoiled since the East Coast is “live” tweeting the events 3 hours earlier.
1b. Why I REALLY Hate Tape Delay: The 2010 Vancouver Games were also aired on tape delay. Yes, Vancouver is on the West Coast.
2. The Editing: Since you insist on tape-delaying the games, you could arguably make the games better. But nooooo, you made them worse. First, there was the horribly offensive removal of the terrorism tribute in favor of Ryan Seacrest interviewing Michael Phelps.
Aside: New York City is bidding on the 2020 Olympics. Can you imagine the outcry if the BBC omitted a 9/11 tribute? So much fail.
And again with improving by editing; NBC, did it not occur to you to edit out Bob Costas’ tasteless Idi Amin joke during the Parade of Nations? Or realize that all the comments about African nations were condescending, and perhaps it would be a good idea to re-record a few of the intros? And why were some of the countries cut out of the Opening Ceremonies? Again, the event was not aired live.
3.Spoilers: Hypothetically – someone goes all day without logging onto the Internet, watching TV, reading a newspaper (ask your grandparents) or talking to people. NBC, you STILL managed to spoil it for the three people at Shady Creek Retirement Home who meet that criteria by introducing a race with, “Hey Missy Franklin won this upcoming race.”
4. Your Bootleg Livestream: Why is it that your ads come in clear but the actual sports are fuzzy and choppy? Did it not occur to you that you’d be getting, say, slightly more web traffic than usual? Again, these problems don’t happen on TV.
5. Your “F*ck Effort” Attitude: you could at least pretend to care, but nooooo…. Instead you try to censor a journalist who encouraged people to stop complaining on twitter and go to the source. But the source doesn’t care what you think.
But I am your people, and I’m here to help. First and foremost, embrace the magic of this newfangled “live TV.” This is easy – you have eleventeen channels. And cut down on the incessant chatter. That way (I’m talking to you, Meredith Viera) people won’t use the Internet to point out that you don’t know who that random Sir Tim Berners-Lee guy is in the Opening Ceremonies. Or you could ask Ann Curry to do the commentary. I bet she knows.
I am your people. Read the comments for advice from my people.